{UAH} Pojim/WBK: WIFESPEAK: Guys, beware, women have the memory of an elephant - Living | Daily Nation

http://www.nation.co.ke/lifestyle/Living/women-have-the-memory-of-an-elephant/-/1218/2911832/-/10xyksaz/-/index.html

WIFESPEAK: Guys, beware, women have the memory of an elephant - Living

"Forgivess is one of the most important values you should embrace in marriage," said the guest speaker at a family festival week organised by our church. Hubby nudged me. I ignored him and looked straight ahead.

"It is amazing how us women can remember, with such clarity, a wrong our husbands committed seven years ago," continued the speaker as the men collectively nodded.

"Yes!" hubby said, again nudging me and pointing at the speaker. He really was enjoying this.

"I hope you are paying attention here," he added when he noticed how busy I was pretending to be on my phone. I eventually threw him a stern look, knowing very well he was referring to my very long memory. 

Hubby still gets astounded when I remind him about incidences in the past that I felt offended me, either because of something he said or did. Or did not do, when I expected him to.

Take this one for example,

"Do you remember when I was expecting our second born and you told me that I looked like a balloon?"

He looked surprised and then said, "Really?" He then laughed. I did not find anything funny about that, so I snorted and gave him more details about the incident in an attempt to revive his memory. I even reminded him of the exact hour.

"We had a birthday party and I was decorating the house with balloons."

"I must have been joking," he said.

Other times, he will claim that I am either exaggerating, or he outright denies ever committing such an offence against me!

"Women are emotion-driven. We connect the dots and remember everything, because it is always related to an emotion," continued the speaker, as hubby shook his head, clearly, needing interpretation of this foreign dialect, something I observed on all the men's faces as the woman talked about emotions. It was now my turn to nudge him when she said;

"Women are nurturers and multipliers. You give her a tiny seed, she nurtures it in her for nine months and gives you a 3kgs baby. In the same way, you give her one thoughtless or unkind word, she will marinate it for days or weeks, nurture it, and by the time she is done, it will have multiplied to a ton of Armageddon."

How true. See, guys like to provide quick fixes and solutions to everything, including our feelings.

You are offended? He is quick to apologise and to completely forget about that story, which he locks up in the 'problem solved' box and immediately shreds it into oblivion. Only sir, you forget one thing; to sort out the problem of the woman's memory.

It is worse because most men speak out their thoughts without fine-processing them never having fully grasped the definition of hindsight even after years of living with a woman. By the time he is done putting both feet in the mouth, he is in more trouble than a Hague suspect.

For everything you say, or do, heck, even what you think, your woman will dissect it, turn it around like a chapatti on a hot pan, use her imagination to marinate it and slowly but surely bake it with her other pastries of thoughts and assumptions.

She will not let that comment slide past her until she digs deeper into its core, studies it under a microscope, before finally unleashing it to you.

A happy wife equals a happy husband, happy children, happy village and a happy nation! While I am learning to let go of some things, and not to personalise stuff, hubby too (I hope) is finally learning the art of listening to my emotions.

Never mind the pained expression he tries so hard to hide when I utter the four most dreaded words in a man's vocabulary; we need to talk.

WIFESPEAK: Guys, beware, women have the memory of an elephant - Living | Daily Nation

http://www.nation.co.ke/lifestyle/Living/women-have-the-memory-of-an-elephant/-/1218/2911832/-/10xyksaz/-/index.html

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