{UAH} HOW TO FORGET A SIDE DISH IN YOUR LIFE!

HOW TO FORGET A SIDE DISH IN YOUR LIFE!

Posted on February 19, 2014 by Uganda Muslim Brothers and Sisters

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Believe me and us that it is possible to get the other woman out of your life. All it takes is patience. And this patience varies from person to person, depending on the nature and level of relationship you had developed with the other woman; it also depends on your personality.

It can take a year, two years, five years and other times decades together. Eventually that love, attraction and affection towards the other woman wanes. How long it will take is what I can not predict. That knowledge is with ALLAH.

Take home message:

1. Take comfort in the fact that many people have been along thay path, and have retraced their steps and got over it. So you can! You are not alone. If others managed, you can manage as well.

2. Patience: good you have already acknowledged your weakness for the other woman. This is a good starting point. Then put your trust in ALLAH and ask him to remove the other woman out of your life and replace him with your wife.

3. Patience: put yourself in your wife’s shoes. How would you have felt if she loved another man but puts up with you. What am trying to communicate here is that be fair to the mother (or future mother) of your children. Treat her well as you would have wished to be treated. Simply put, give her your genuine love. If love her genuinely without holding back, she will eventually become your best. Am sure there are some false starts. But all these are just imaginations in your mind; you should work towards dropping them.

4. Patience: you have to consciously develop it in your mind that your wife is better than the other woman. Apparently this is not in your mind. You used your current wife as solution to a problem your feared most (zina). Now that you are together drop the other feeling of your wife being a solution to your earlier problem. Now work towards making your wife your best friend and lover. With patience and of course ALLAH’s favor and guidance you will succeed.

At the moment what you have is impatience. But ALLAH’s patience is much stronger than you can ever imagine. It is this patience that has enabled you share your suffering with us. And I hope and pray that find the answer in what we have offered.

Bottom line is patience, patience and patience and work towards this patience. You have the hero inside yourself to love your wife and forget the woman.

MARRYING THE SIDE DISH?
Having the other woman as second wife will only compound the problem. Problems of the mind are better handled in a very patient manner. Quick fixes don’t work. In the end the you might keep on marrying one woman after another without getting the satisfaction he needs if he were to follow your proposal. The sheikhs can also add to the counseling as long as they keep off the blame game (emphasizing the sinning part). With patience this brother you can succeed with your current wife. The answer lies in patience, patience and patience and understanding what he has to do.

Hope this is helpful!

May the ALMIGHTY ALLAH guide you and guide us all on the straight path.

Ibrah Ssendagire
UMBS member in Kampala

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Rehema
Patriot in Kampala,East Africa:UMBS is a registered organization devoted to matters of interest to Muslims in Uganda.Muslims from other countries are welcome to join us too. Follow us on Twitter at: http://twitter.com/#!/UMBSFORUM. To donate to UMBS activities, click on: http://um-bs.com/donate/ or just deposit money on UMBS Bank A/C at Bank of Africa:07074320002 .