{UAH} HOW OLD IS YOUNG AMAMA?

AGE SECRETS

After wallowing in blissful ignorance for forty years, Hon Amama Mbabazi of Kinkizi West recently discovered that his buddy, President Yoweri Kaguta Museveni had been lying about his true age. So powerful was the revelation that Mr. Mbabazi engaged lawyers to set Museveni's 'true age' by law and make it unlawful for Museveni to contest the 2016 elections.

The undeniable fact which Mbabazi stressed was that Museveni (71) is old. However, he also expected this statement of fact to prove that he, Mbabazi, is not just younger than Museveni but actually very young, at 67.

The outward reason why hordes of youth seem to be rallying behind Mr. Mbabazi is because he is not just younger than Museveni but actually feels as young as the Poor Youth squads that he is spawning. The inward (and real) reason for Mr. Mbabazi's seemingly immense popularity is his King Midas Touch. A mere glance at you will line your pockets with Legal Tender!

Unfortunately, like it happened when King Midas touched his daughter Marigold and turned her into solid gold, Mr. Mbabazi's reckless decision to involve his children in his Statehouse ambitions have begun to hurt the family…

 

As the elections draw nearer,we are hearing from Mr. Mbabazi's camp that Mbabazi's buddy (until a few hours ago) Museveni not a Ugandan. This is in addition to being "too old" and more is coming...

AMAMA @BBC

Following his failure to tiur Mbale, a furious Mr. Mbabazi fumed on BBC that not even the tyrannical President Idi Amin had gone to the extent of arresting Mbabazi's children. Here was further evidence that Mzee Yoweri had indeed sunk to the very nadir of incorrigibility!

However, we were prompted to wonder! Did Mr. Mbabazi sire any children between 1971 and 1979 when Amin ruled? If he had any, had they reached the age of being lawfully arrested? And though it is less important, were these children mothered by Mrs. Jacqueline Mbabazi?

I will assume that Mr. Mbabazi found space on Amin's wanted list in 1973 after the abortive guerrilla attack from Tanzania. If he had an 18-year old child in 1973, I will assume that Mr. Mbabazi fathered this child (or children?) when he was 20, which would put his age at 38 in 1973. If true, Mbabazi is now aged 80. If the child was 18 in 1979 when Amin was toppled, he or she would be 54 years old today and this would make the father (Mbabazi) at least 74, three years older than the ancient Yoweri.

If Mr. Mbabazi does not have any children in this age bracket, the truth must be that he did not tell the truth on BBC. If he has any such children, then Hon John Patrick Amama Mbabazi, SC, MP, must be older than His Excellency Yoweri Kaguta Museveni.

As I await yet more skeletons from the closets of my once solidly united commanders, I rest my case!

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