{UAH} WBK, MOSES NEKYON, P'OJIM :KENYAN GIRLS

WBK, Moses Nekyon and Edward P'Ojim,

As adopted Kenyans, can you give me an idea, a very general one
because I know every relationship has its own vibes and
characteristics, on how Ugandan men have got on with Kenyan,
specifically Kikuyu, women? I have very little clue really. I only
have known of one here in the UK, of a Ugandan doctor and a Kikuyu
woman, but the relationship was very turbulent.

About two years ago, I met a Kikuyu woman at a conference in Brussels,
Belgium. She works for an NGO in Nairobi. We got into a relationship
and have been keeping it long-distance, on an on-off basis, mainly by
her travelling to the UK, which is very expensive.. But she has got
tired and told me her family have decided I must make up my mind what
I want with the relationship or end it. This is not a threat but a
fact. She says 2 years is too long to be hanging around a man, and
that at 34, she wants to start a family..

I am very reluctant to get married for a fourth time. Since my last
separation from my Barbados wife in 2009, I have been living on my
own and I have got so much used to being a single man that I would
find it very difficult to adjust to married life again. My main worry
is how I would cope with a Kikuyu woman. She is very loving, very
caring, very cosmopolitan and highly educated, and we share a lot in
common. But I don't know anything about Kikuyu women and how they
relate to other cultures. Some stories you read in Kenyan papers
sometimes make disparaging accusations about Kikuyu women, of being
dominating etc. I am sure a lot of these stories are fairy tales the
same as in Uganda, that people tell about other tribes.

I don't really want to hurt the woman the way I hurt the Barbados
woman because after our relationship broke up in 2009, she left the
UK, and returned to Barbados for good, to a country she had never in
at all, only had grandparents. She has never come back again to the UK
even though it is a country she is born in and grew up in all her
life.

I have got up to the end of June to make up my mind. May be I should
just remain single and feed on take-ways like most divorced men do
these days.


George Okello

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