{UAH} Jesus died to give us two bank holidays

Jesus died to give us two bank holidays

17th April 2014

THE Archbishop of Canterbury has given thanks to Jesus, who gave his life so that we could have not just a Monday off work but a Friday too.

Jesus, God's only begotten son, died for his belief that workers deserve a four-day paid break just when the weather is beginning to pick up.

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Archbishop Justin Welby said: "The heavenly miracle of Good Friday was bought with the blood of the Lamb, spilt for everyone who's got a bit of decorating to do."

Biblical scholars believe Jesus was a carpenter, hard at work in Nazareth, who received a divine revelation telling him to take a few days off and maybe catch some rays at the Sea of Galilee.

Jesus's teachings spread until Easter became a holiday long enough to get 12 friends together and head into Jerusalem for a big meal with plenty of wine.

The Archbishop, reading from the Bible, said: "Now when the evening did come, He died on the cross. And behold, on the third day He rose again, nice and late after his first proper lie-in in ages.

"And He said unto them, Fear not ye for there is still no work tomorrow. Lo, does anyone fancy a pint?"

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