{UAH} MY TAKE ON LUGANDA

Make no mistake about it, I love the language even tho I dont understand an iota of a full sentence except disjointed words here and there - and they barely exceed my ten fingers count. So dont waste time insulting or calling me names in Luganda bcos they will all go with the wind.

Now here are the thingis about the Luganda I love to hear but not from every baboon's mouse or mouth. 

1 . Men should be banned from speaking Luganda. Men make BS of this otherwise romantic language. The sounds, whispers and whistles of Luganda emanating from any woman's mouth is the most soothing and therapeutically proven language I have ever heard - which makes me want to never know anymore words than the finger counts I know today. I prefer the rest remaining like the meaningless sounds of New Age or Water music that simply titillates and unwinds my exhausted mind without leaving any permanent words in my mind or heart to interprete.

Men harass, assault, butcher and mutilate Luganda. They are coarse right from infancy. They rumble and grumble pronouncing every word or sentence. They make no sense. Looking back, I am still reminded as a kid to never attempt learning or knowing the language bcos I would be branded a "Thief". Up in my Northern forest any man spotted or eavesdropped on speaking Luganda was to be given 24 hr watch bcos, by default or the slip of tongue pronouncing a known or recognized word, the man is a Thief. That meant there was a Thief lurking in town and soon someone or anyone was going to discover some important thing amiss.

But here is the twist. I also grew up being told any non-Muganda woman speaking Luganda or trying to show mastery of the language is a Malaya but when spoken by a Muganda woman its angelic beauty. And thats the only time I could tell that the Acholi knows how to practically define and separate romance from lust. I want to believe that it was the point at which my mind etched and planted roots in loving Luganda only when spoken by a woman. And indeed, I gotta confess that in my Greater Canadian Uganda community when a I bump into a a group of men speaking Luganda I characteristically first deem the group a bunch of Ali Babas. I dont know why and dont ask me but if I bump into a group of women smoothing the language it will be extremely difficult to pluck me from smooching around or within them

2. My fear of Luganda in Uganda today is that the language will in a few years reduce English and Swahili to second and third languages respectively. In a few years schools up in my Northern forest will be taught in Luganda and not English and that means schools curricula are bound to change. In brief, Uganda is destined to be another Ethiopia as a country with its own official native language (Ahmaric. Luganda) and never to adapt to a foreign language (English). Our grand kids have opened the can of worms to the extent all my nephews and nieces u in Kitgum these days are freaking fluent in Luganda. matter of fact, one I spoke to recently asked me in the face (on phone), "Uncle, omanyi Luganda?". It so happened that I saved the sentence in my memory during a grocery escapade at Bugolobi's Middle East with Nakitiyo my brother's (the prettiest Nakaseke Muganda woman I have ever met) so I knew my niece was asking me if I spoke the language. Of course, I answered her "No" in English and made sure she knew I understood her question by sugarcoating my response with "Uncle simanyi Luganda". That sugar was itself the opening salvos or bombastic Luganda sentences from the motormouth who ranted incessantly with every word of it sounding mozart in my ears.

Question is, is this good or bad for the country?

CAUTION TO ALL MEN: Please, dont speak Luganda in my presence bcos inside I will be observing and concluding you otherwise.

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Gwokto La'Kitgum

"Even a small dog can piss on a tall Building", Jim Hightower

"But this I know, UPC believed and still believes in

very high education. We can call Obote all bad names we have, but the bottom line remains that he got more scholarships for Buganda than all previous Uganda leaders combined. That includes Sir Edward Mutesa, President Lule, President Binayisa, up to and into Ssabasajja Mutebi. Who all happen to be Baganda leaders." Mulindwa

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